|
Brethren,
As
always,
our
annual
Draft
on
Friday
night
as
an
absolute
gas,
the
funnest
day
of
the
year,
sans
exception.
This
was
our
27th
Hot
Stove
League
Draft,
and
if
I’m
not
mistaken,
the
25th
Draft
that
has
taken
place
at
our
law
firm.
Parenthetically,
one
of
these
days
I
will
drag
out
and
dust
off
the
league
archives,
and
provide
a
few
priceless
memories
from
the
early
years
of
the
Draft.
Before
embarking
upon
my
annual
assessment
of
the
Draft,
I
want
to
be
sure
to
thank
all
of
those
individuals
who
helped
make
it
not
only
possible,
but
thoroughly
enjoyable:
Jim
Ed
and
B.T.,
for
lining
up,
picking
up
and
paying
for
the
delicious
eats
from
Big
Fred’s
and
elsewhere;
Screech,
Underbelly,
Stretch,
Mouse
and
anyone
else
who
brought
along
liquid
refreshments
(not
that
these
are
important
or
even
necessary);
Big
Guy,
for
wearing
his
Commissioner’s
hat
and
keeping
us
on
track
and
on
task,
and
for
taking
the
time
to
submit
each
and
every
one
of
our
390
drafted
players;
Linda,
our
Webmaster
Extraordinaire,
for
preparing
our
Draft
materials
and
everything
else
she
does
to
help
facilitate
our
fun;
Tirebiter,
for
lining
up
the
War
Room
and
making
sure
we
had
basketball
for
Stretch
and
hockey
for
Tricko;
Possum,
for
bringing
his
wooden
bat
and
keeping
us
all
alert
with
his
shrieks,
howls,
yells,
animal
screams
and
other
bizarre
behavior;
Shamu,
for
participating
long
distance
as
he
drove
to
the
aid
of
his
ailing
father;
and
to
all
of
the
rest
of
us,
for
showing
up,
bringing
money
to
square
up
on
past
wagers,
and
for
being
an
integral
part
of
the
best
fantasy
league
in
the
world!
It
takes
each
and
every
one
of
us
to
make
it
the
BEST
DAY
OF
THE
YEAR!
Thanks,
also,
to
all
of
you
for
agreeing
to
move
the
Draft
to
Friday
night,
which
turned
out
to
be a
pretty
popular
decision
anyway.
SKIP’S
BLIPS
Since
Possum
has
already
taken
care
of
assessing
all
of
the
teams
in
his
Message
Board
blog,
I
will
refrain
from
giving
you
all
my
annual
“Skipper’s
Picks
‘N’
Pans,”
but
I
can’t
resist
predicting
the
order
of
finishes
and
making
at
least
a
few
comments
on
this
year’s
Draft.
|
Wahoos
POF: 8 |
Pulled a Mama Cass by taking Tulo over Prince Albert in Round 1. Mitigated the blunder somewhat by getting Holliday in the 3rd. Picked “Man Crush” players way too many times (and said “Man Crush” way too many times). A decent team, but not a championship team.
|
|
Chiefs
POF: 6 |
Love that infield, hate that outfield. Starting pitching as suspect as one of Itchie’s customer promises. BT’s weakest Draft in several years. Don’t quit your day job, Scott. Oh, that’s right, you don’t have a day job.
|
|
Cubs
POF: 3 |
Best team ever picked from a moving vehicle. Who was in the car with you, Shamu, Harold Reynolds and Buster Olney? What a team! Older than dirt, but what great dirt. Pure Missouri River basin soil. A definite contender.
|
|
Monarchs
POF: 2 |
Made a mockery of the league by picking first sackers Cabrera & Teixeira (sounds like a Tex-Mex singing duo) One Two. Dominating infield, strong outfield, respectable pitching. A force to be reckoned with, I reckon. Sure to be in the race, but not strong enough to displace one team.
|
|
Bums
POF: 9 |
Votto will disappoint as the reigning MVP. Starting pitching will be throwing way too many balls in the hitters’ haven known as The Ballpark at Arlington. Sorry, Mitch, looks like you spit the bit this year. Too much attention to Mavs hockey?
|
|
Redbirds
POF: 11 |
Love Robinson Cano. Yankee Stadium was made for him. Zimm in the 2nd is just fine. Posey in the 3rd, nice player, tad early. Beyond that, vomitus extremus. Could be a rough season for the Birds. Sorry, Jim Ed. At least you are a damn fine lawyer‒‒or at least that’s what you tell everyone!
|
|
Tigers
POF: 7 |
Cargo in the 1st, King Felix in the 2nd, Mauer in the 3rd, Greinke in the 4th, Kinsler in the 5th. May be the best in the league, 1 through 5. Could be the year of the Bengal. Or not.
|
|
Bears
POF: 5 |
Fighting Denny Bontrager did himself proud this year. Top pitcher in Halladay, stud-dog Howard in the 2nd, JaHey in the 3rd, young studs everywhere. A promising bunch. Well done, SloPay. Well done.
|
|
Jacks
POF: 12 |
Itchie loves the Chosen People, drafting Braunie in the 1st. After that, forgettable. This sorry bunch won’t get a sniff. Foster, you better focus on your fantasy jai-alai league this year. Practice saying it: penultimate.
|
|
Tribe
POF: 10 |
A pitching staff for the ages. Trouble is, this league is all about hitting, and other than A-Gonz, this team is hitting on no cylinders. Gonna be a long season for the long-suffering Tribe. Lots of reservations on this Reservation.
|
|
Bombers
POF: 4 |
With a starting infield of ARod, Dunn, Uggla and Reynolds, this team might have more power than the ’27 Yankees. If properly managed, the team has the potential to vault Mouse to his first HSL Crown. I repeat: If properly managed.
|
|
Blues
POF: 13 |
McJester has a pitching staff which could be tops in the league. The infield has more question marks than the Riddler, however, and so Stretch has his work cut out for him. Look for a lower finish in the Lower Division for the Elongated, Plumed One. Sorry, Jon, it says here that this team is destined for the league bowels.
|
|
Senators
POF: 1 |
What can I say, a great team. With any luck at all, Skipper’s looking at a fifth HSL Crown. Like taking candy from a dumb baby, baby!
|
That’s
it
for
this
year,
men.
Good
luck
to
each
and
every
one
of
your
teams.
Now,
let’s
PLAY
BALL!
|
|
