2013 Season

Edition No. 11

May 20, 2013

 

 

 

Brethren:

 

Having survived my second medical malpractice jury trial in the past six weeks, I finally have a chance to look at our website and see what has been happening while my attention has been diverted elsewhere.  To my profound disappointment and chagrin, I see that scheduled Guest Writer Possum “I can blog 500,000 words a night when it’s not required of me” Bridges—who was scheduled to post his guest article no later than May 7, 2013—has again thumbed his nose at us.  He keeps alive his skein of bowed-neck refusals to meet deadlines imposed upon him by others for a solid seventh season.  (Editor’s note:  I pity the poor sap at the BIFund who has to corral Possum for his contribution to the annual Fund Newsletter—probably a revolving door position at BIF.)

 

In any event, since Linda led Ted to the oasis but could not make him drink of it, I will share with you a few thoughts of my own instead of promising you an actual newsletter from Possum. 

 

Here are the standings and leaderboards through Sunday, May 19, 2013:

 

1.

Redbirds

3469.40

2.

Tribe

3283.30

3.

Tigers

3280.70

4.

Wahoos

3204.90

5.

Blues

3134.70

6.

Bums

3111.00

7.

Monarchs

3089.60

8.

Chiefs

3074.80

9.

Cubs

3058.10

10.

Chelsea Warriors      

2998.80

11.

Bronx Bombers

2924.10

12.

Bears

2742.20

13.

Senators

2621.20

 

TOP 10 BATTERS

 

1.

Miguel Cabrera

Bums

256.70

2.

Paul Goldschmidt      

Chiefs

215.60

3.

Shin-Soo Choo

Bronx Bombers      

214.10

4.

Joey Votto

Wahoos

210.20

5.

Chris Davis

Tribe

207.40

6.

Carlos González

Chelsea Warriors

205.80

7.

Justin Upton

Monarchs

197.50

8.

Jean Segura

Tigers

195.70

9.

Evan Longoria

Chelsea Warriors

195.20

10.

Dustin Pedroia

Chiefs

192.20

 

 

TOP 10 PITCHERS

 

1.

  

Matt Harvey

Chiefs

279.00

2.

 

Clay Buchholz

Bums

266.00

3.

 

Yu Darvish

Blues

258.00

4.

 

Félix Hernández

Blues

254.00

5.

 

Jordan Zimmermann    

Redbirds  

254.00

6.

 

Clayton Kershaw

Tigers

250.00

7.

 

Justin Masterson

Tribe

247.00

8.

 

Hisashi Iwakuma

Tribe

243.00

9.

 

Chris Sale

Bears

237.00

10.

 

Adam Wainwright     

Wahoos

230.00

 

SHORT HOPS

 

*

I love seeing the Tribe, the Redbirds and the Tigers among the league leaders, a trio of teams that aren’t exactly associated with Hot Stove League greatness.  Wouldn’t it be grand for these three teams to stay in contention the entire season long, so that we might hope for the Tribe or the Redbirds to snare their first-ever HSL crown, or for the Tigers to win it all for the first since the Harding administration?  Of course, the usual suspects (Shamu, B.T., Magpie) will probably have something to say about all of this. 

 

*

I can’t remember ever having a pitching staff with more injury problems than this season.  Jared Weaver goes down the second week of the season, Roy Halladay follows him a few weeks later (perhaps a blessing, however) and Wei-Yin Chen follows suit last week.  I realize I picked a crummy team to begin with, but do the baseball gods have to pile it on by decimating my already inferior pitching staff?  In the immortal words of Pedro Cerrano, “FU Jobu!”

 

*

I am so unfamiliar with the latest crop of young up-and-comers that I might as well be ordering dinner in Tehran as shopping for free agents to bolster my flagging hopes for a second consecutive year out of the league bowels.  While I can still win a case or two in the courtroom with my Caveman Lawyer shtick, it doesn’t play nearly as well in the Information Age of Fantasy Baseball.  Like a hopeless marcher on the road to Bataan, I have accepted my fate. 

 

THE WRITE STUFF

 

I just finished two entertaining but decidedly not great baseball books, the first by  ESPNbaseball analyst Tim Kurkjian, entitled “Is This a Great Game, or What?”, and the second by former minor league journeyman/Major League hopeful Dirk Hayhurst, entitled “The Bullpen Gospels.”  While both of these fellows have funny stories to tell and do so in a competent fashion, neither author has the knack of turning a phrase, as I like to put it, or using just the right adjective, constructing just the right metaphor, or otherwise making their words dance off the page and into our memory banks. 

 

It is a rare quality and a rare talent, and to some it probably comes naturally, to others only as a result of very hard work. 

 

While Kurkjian and Hayhurst may both be experts in their respective fields (baseball reporter/broadcaster and baseball player), they are clearly not baseball writers by training or experience, and it shows.  I was thinking about this as I read Tom Shatel’s Sunday morning Omaha World-Herald article about Husker baseball coach Darin Erstad, because the difference in their writing is so stark.  Just read the first few sentences of Shatel’s article about Erstad:

 

You figure Darin Erstad would be the one bug that broke the windshield.

 

Nebraska’s baseball coach has gone headfirst every day of his baseball career.  He wakes up each morning with dirt already on his pajamas. 

 

Hates to lose?  More than he loved winning. 

 

The guy can flat write.  I mean, he would never use that last line himself (The guy can flat write) because it’s too commonplace, too hackneyed, too overused. 

 

I’m pretty sure that Shatel’s first love is college football, but I wish it was baseball, because he is really talented at writing about it, and there are so many more nuances, and so much more history, to write about in baseball. 

 

If I had to rank my favorite baseball writers, I think it would go like this:

 

1.

Tom Boswell

2.

Roger Angell

3.

Roger Kahn

4.

Bill James

5.

David Halberstam

 

Now reading:  “Wherever I Wind Up,” by R.A. Dickey. 

 

TO THE PARK

 

To give my aimless life a bit of direction, I decided this past week that my goal for this summer is to visit ten new minor league ballparks, hopefully knocking off a few new state capitol building visits along the way. 

 

First stop:  Weather permitting, Lewis & Clark Park in Sioux City, to see the Explorers take on the New Jersey Jackals tonight. 

 

Have a great week!

 

Skipper



 

 

 

 

Our 509th edition