2016 Season

Edition No. 29

October 7, 2016
 
 

 

Brethren: 

WAHOOS WIN

 

Now that the dust has settled from last week’s epic, guerrilla warfare, fight-to-the-finish, Texas death match between Possum and Shamu; now that the point totals have all been counted, confirmed and reconfirmed, including the Hanging Chads from the West Des Moines precinct; now that Possum has called in every last marker with the Man Upstairs and Doubled Down with the Devil Down Below; and now that the wily Wahoos’ owner has squeezed out every last molecule of luck from the toothpaste tube, and jabbed every last pin and needle into his Shamu voodoo doll; the results are in.  Wahoos Win.  Take a look:

 

FINAL STANDINGS

 

1

Wahoos

   12792.9   

-

2

Cubs

12719.4

73.5

3

Tigers

12498.5

294.4

4

Chiefs

12343.8

449.1

5

Skipjacks

11994.4

798.5

6

Bums

11901.2

891.7

7

Blues

11683.4

   1109.5   

8

Bombers

11669.2

1123.7

9

Monarchs     

11580.9

1212.0

10

Tribe

11490.9

1302.0

11

Bears

11477.2

1315.7

12

Senators

11190.9

1602.0

DAL   

Redbirds

11116.0

1676.9

 

Congratulations to all for an outstanding 2016 Campaign, and to each and every one of you who fought to the finish for your final place in the standings, even if it meant that you were fighting for 5th place instead of 6th, 9th place instead of 10th, or even 12th place instead of DEAD ASS LAST.  (Sorry, Tirebiter, but you may as well get used to that distinction--it will probably come up again once or twice in future editions of FTB.)  Pride really matters in this league. 

 

RECORD OF FINAL FINISHES

 

Name

Owner

’85

’86

’87

’88

’89

’90

’91

’92

’93

’94

’95

Wahoos/Red Sox

Possum

1

1

5

2

2

4

5

6

4

4

3

Cubs

Shamu

2

5

7

9

9

10

3

4

10

1*

12

Senators/Royals

Skipper

3

2

2

7

8

1

9

2

3

11

11

Tigers

Big Guy

4

3

1

1

1

6

2

5

9

10

6

Chiefs/Cards/Giants

B.T.

5

4

6

4

6

2

7

10

2

3

10

Tribe/Braves

Underbelly

—

6

3

10

4

9

8

8

7

8

7

Bears/Pirates

SloPay

—

—

4

3

5

5

4

9

12

12

9

Blues

McBlunder

—

—

8

8

10

8

6

7

8

7

4T

Da Bums/High-

landers/Reds

Tricko

—

—

—

5

3

3

1

3

1

2

4T

Chelsea Warriors/

Skipjacks/Mudhens

Itchie

—

—

—

6

7

7

10

1

6

6

1

Redbirds

Tirebiter

—

—

—

—

—

—

—

—

5

5

2

Bronx Bombers

Mouse

—

—

—

—

—

—

—

—

11

9

8

Monarchs

Screech

—

—

—

—

—

—

—

—

—

—

—

 

Name

Owner

’96

’97

’98

’99

’00

’01

’02

’03

’04

’05

’06

Wahoos/Red Sox

Possum

4

3

8

11

1

3

3

6

4

8

2

Cubs

Shamu

8

9

4

4

10

6

4

4

11

11

5

Senators/Royals

Skipper

9

1

3

7

5

1

7

3

1

3

10

Tigers

Big Guy

5

7

6

3

8

7

12

12

3

7

6

Chiefs/Cards/Giants

B.T.

1

8

2

2

7

12

5

5

7

4

4

Tribe/Braves

Underbelly

3

10

10

8

11

5

10

10

12

10

12

Bears/Pirates

SloPay

10

12

12

6

12

9

11

9

9

9

1

Blues

McBlunder

7

4

1

10

6

8

8

11

10

12

11

Da Bums/High-

landers/Reds

Tricko

6

6

11

5

2

2

2

1

6

6

3

Chelsea Warriors/

Skipjacks/Mudhens

Itchie

11

5

9

1

3

4

1

2

5

1

8

Redbirds

Tirebiter

2

2

5

9

4

10

9

8

2

2

7

Bronx Bombers

Mouse

12

11

7

12

9

11

6

7

8

5

9

Monarchs

Screech

—

—

—

—

—

—

—

—

—

—

—

 

Name

Owner

’07

’08

’09

’10

’11

’12

’13

’14

’15

’16

Wahoos/Red Sox

Possum

5

6

3

1

5

2

4

2

2

1

Cubs

Shamu

1

4

1

3

3

6

5

7

3

2

Senators/Royals

Skipper

13

12

13

13

13

12

13

12

13

12

Tigers

Big Guy

9

13

12

7

9

7

11

6

11

3

Chiefs/Cards/Giants

B.T.

4

5

2

2

1

3

1

3

1

4

Tribe/Braves

Underbelly

10

11

4

10

4

11

3

9

10

10

Bears/Pirates

SloPay

3

7

11

8

11

13

10

8

6

11

Blues

McBlunder

11

1

9

12

6

8

6

10

8

7

Da Bums/High-

landers/Reds

Tricko

2

3

10

5

2

1

8

4

4

6

Skipjacks/Chelsea Warriors/

Skipjacks/Mudhens

Itchie

8

8

6

9

8

9

7

13

9

5

Redbirds

Tirebiter

7

10

7

6

12

4

2

5

7

13

Bronx Bombers

Mouse

12

9

8

11

10

10

12

11

5

8

Monarchs

Screech

6

2

5

4

7

5

9

1

12

9

 

Possum’s title in 2016 was his team’s 5th in 32 years of Hot Stove League competition.  With his championship 2016 season, Possum joins the rarified air of the one Owner who earned a 5th title ahead of him, Big Johnny.  I am sure that I speak for Foster in congratulating Possum for joining his select company, while asking the obvious question:  “What took you so long?”

 

Shamu’s bridesmaid finish was unexpected and impressive, given the subpar selections that he made on Draft Day.  Our erstwhile crimson-topped colleague has once again proven that if one devotes full-time employment to managing one’s Hot Stove League team over the course of six months, one can make up a whole lot of ground between Draft Day and the end of the season.  Well played, Mauer. 

 

And by the way, Shamu’s 2nd-place finish was the second time that his Cubs have finished just one spot down from the top of the heap, and his ninth money finish in 32 years of Hot Stove League competition.  It makes me wonder how things might have turned out different for Sir Charles if he had devoted one-fifth of the time to his law school studies that he expends in our HSL competitions--perhaps a top pick for the existing Supreme Court vacancy in a Trump Administration?  Isn’t it about time for an Irish ginger from the Midwest to give a little diversity to the Court?  Fascinating to ponder.

 

Big Guy’s Tigers finished 3rd with 12498.5 points, his team’s highest finish in an HSL campaign since 2004, and his fourth 3rd-place finish in 32 years to go with his three Dead Ball Era titles and one 2nd-place finish.  For quite a while back in the dog days of summer, I was certain that Big Guy’s team was going to stay hot and overtake the Wahoos and finish at the top, the luck of the Possum notwithstanding.  Nevertheless, congrats on a fine effort and a terrific 2016 season by Big Guy. 

 

Since I am gearing up for a jury trial next week, I will have to keep this edition of From the Bullpen short, but we will leave you with the point totals for the top 25 hitters and the top 25 pitchers for the 2016 season. 

 

TOP 25 PITCHERS FOR 2016 SEASON

 

1

Max Scherzer

Monarchs

   886.0   

2

Justin Verlander

Chiefs

814.0

3

Madison Bumgarner    

Bums

798.0

4

Chris Sale

Tigers

747.0

5

Corey Kluber

Tigers

734.0

6

José Fernández

Tribe

692.0

7

Kyle Hendricks

Skipjacks

681.0

8

David Price

Wahoos

679.0

9

Noah Syndergaard

Tribe

655.5

10

Tanner Roark

Bums

653.5

11

J.A. Happ

Tigers

652.0

12

Aarón Sánchez

Chiefs

637.0

13

Clayton Kershaw

Blues

635.0

14

Masahiro Tanaka

Redbirds

631.0

15

Carlos Martínez

Bears

609.0

16

John Lackey

Blues

594.0

17

Kenta Maeda

Chiefs

552.0

18

Jerad Eickhoff

Cubs

538.0

18

Julio Teherán

Skipjacks

538.0

20

Bartolo Colón

Redbirds

537.0

21

Jeff Samardzija

Bombers

536.0

22

Jake Odorizzi

Monarchs     

535.0

23

Ian Kennedy

Bombers

534.0

24

Matt Moore

Redbirds

520.0

24   

Jeremy Hellickson

Tigers

520.0

 

TOP 25 HITTERS FOR 2016 SEASON

 

1

Mike Trout

Chiefs

   751.7   

2

Nolan Arenado

Skipjacks

737.3

3

Josh Donaldson

Bombers

727.7

4

José Altuve

Redbirds

726.3

5

Mookie Betts

Bums

715.4

6

Kris Bryant

Tribe

710.2

7

Joey Votto

Chiefs

700.7

8

Freddie Freeman

Redbirds

691.2

9

Paul Goldschmidt

Cubs

684.6

10

Robinson Canó

Bums

682.9

11

David Ortiz

Cubs

680.5

12

Brian Dozier

Tribe

677.4

13

Miguel Cabrera

Tigers

672.0

14

Edwin Encarnación    

Bombers

661.7

15

Anthony Rizzo

Bums

657.6

16

Nelson Cruz

Tigers

636.2

17

Manny Machado

Bears

635.6

18

Jean Segura

Tribe

633.8

19

Charlie Blackmon

Cubs

629.4

20

Daniel Murphy

Monarchs    

628.7

21

Ian Kinsler

Tigers

621.2

22

DJ LeMahieu

Senators

620.2

23

Xander Bogaerts

Tribe

609.5

24

Corey Seager

Bears

608.6

25   

George Springer

Blues

606.7

 

Congratulations again to Ted for his victorious 2016 season, to Shamu for outstanding effort and a solid second-place finish, to Big Guy for securing the third money spot, and to all of the rest of you for another spirited season of HSL competition.  Thanks to each and every one of you for making this the best fantasy league ever.

 

 

Skipper